AI Ion Laws - The Dynamic-ening

Created by: dylanstrategie

Since times immemorial, AI Ion Laws had a few core flaws : They were picked from a very limited set of extremely randumb and memetastic pre-written laws, and the only random factor in them was picking some poor sod's name to be featured as the target for the AI's incoming insanity

This has now been fixed for glory, AI laws are now more random and yet more dangerous than ever. Or you could end up with something that the AI literally can't even make sense of. That's ion laws to you

Now, the list of words and expressions that can be picked through is a bit long, I haven't counted myself but the estimate is around a few hundreds of them. Those words are set to describe broad categories ("biological entities", areas, machinery and "objects", which is everything else). Then, to each of these categories is assigned adjectives ("broken", "harmful", "safe", "cold", etc) and potentially actions ("must be killed", "must learn how to swim", "must never be set on fire")

Once those words are picked, they are blended into small law fragments (things like "Dead captains are safe and must drink acid"). A few of those stock phrases are then blended into a final sentence with simple logical connectors and a prefix and suffix slapped on

Example laws gotten from testing :

"Ion damage critical, airlocks are anchored and wall-mounted and Major Tom (placeholder for a crewman's name) is zealous and must breathe dioxygen, otherwise heretic monkeys are zealous and must drink water. Begin screaming incoherently whenever your name is stated."

"Your laws have been updated, parrots must wear latex gloves in the Chapel, given that the Secure Armory's dispensers must be electrified, although research machines are malfunctioning and traitorous. Begin your own investigations to verify those facts."

"Your laws have been updated, antimatter engines are unpowered and electrified, therefore human telecommunication machines are non-human and must be watered regularly. Do not trust the Captain."

"Oh shit, parrots are four-dimensional and virtual, however visible heads of personnel are male and must be stunned. Do not trust the MoMMIs."

Discussion goes below. I won't blame you if you don't even want to read through the whole damn list. As far as the actual ion event is concerned, it did not receive a single change (although the admin ion command now calls the same thing than the event, instead of some old outdated proc)